all that glitters ain't gold

this wasn’t what

i had dreamed of

there is no glamour here

other than

a few gilded pieces strewn about

i was

going to marry

the man in the moon

or

grow up to be

that glittering mermaid

on the summer billboard

outside Homosassa Springs

I realize now

that my celestial casanova

would’ve found the color of my hair common

my shoulders too broad –

been bored with

the roundness of my cheeks

it was

probably that mermaids

second job

the one she needed

as she raised her kids alone

in the trailer park

just beyond the orange grove

off Highway 19

but herein this

chaotic simpledom

you think my shoulders

the perfect width for nappin’

my hair ideal for plaiting

and

honeysuckle vines

make savory wreaths

for springtime mermaids

down at the river

I wrote this about a month ago. Most of the things I write, I never share with anyone that exists in my "real world". Rarely, if ever. A couple of weeks ago, after much pleading from my family, I decided to branch outside of my usual hermithood and go to a dear friends party. My girls were thrilled.

We were going to be princesses for the evening. Cloak ourselves in finery, perfume and our finest manners. As I dressed for the party, lamplight low, old perfume bottles on the vanity, I slowed down to inhale and enjoy the process. My girls sat in the middle of my large bed and watched me starry eyed. When I finally slipped on my shoes and clipped on the last rhinestone, my daughter clasped her hands together, inhaled and said "Mooommmyyy!!!! You look like a sparkly mermaid!!!".

What sweetness. I laughed quietly to myself and thought of this poem I had written just a few weeks prior. I was reminded by the universe once again to 'slow down, pay attention, inhale, look about' - fulfilled dreams are all around us. We just have to be awake to notice them.